Fire and Water

Waking in my own bath of sweat was strange.  What was happening to my body?  During chemotherapy, some nights I would awaken in a pool of sweat.  My body drenched like I walked out from the heat of a fire, and the bed soaking from the water that put it out.  My nightgown clung to my damp skin.  “What the…?”  I tried to keep quiet not to awaken my husband who had to work the next day, but he usually slept soundly.

I enjoyed the heavy, layered blankets on top of me when I went to bed, especially since my operation because I’m always feeling chilly.  Between December and April it was quite cold for me in the house at twenty-two degrees Celsius, where my husband liked to keep the temperature.  Without any fat to protect me from chills, even wearing an extra sweater wasn’t enough.  I’m still very sensitive to anything less than twenty-four degrees, since the fat never seems to absorb in my tiny body.

I did hear from other patients that they too would be awakened drenched in their own body fluids, or that they have become more affected by the cold.


For someone special:

… waiting for the sunshine to hit your face, sprinkle particles that will protect you, take away your suffering… and still hope for a miracle – like the one I received.  I love you.


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